Lauren Ferguson | There are no mistakes in art, just opportunites to embellish. (tm)

A Year in Review

You know, I have gone back and started reading some of my own blog.

Y'all, I am funny as hell.  I was cracking myself up today just thinking about all the crazy things that this year has brought my way.

So let me list out my top 10 blog entries for the year 2007.

10.The day that I had to take the driving test over because I had a parking ticket from 1988.

9. The never ending Basement Saga.  To think, it only took 7 months.

8. My daughter gave me HOPE and to think that she probably has no idea.

7. My little girl is growing up so quick.  We have seen the tooth fairy.

6. A reminder that having a few good friends is better than having a slew of acquaintances.

5. Moving to the South does not make you a Southerner.  I will always drink "CAUFEE".

4.Never Ever Ever ship with DHL, unless it is a dead body and you need to hide it.

3. You don't have to ever worry about me going to that famous toy store ever again in my life time.  Hell R Us or Toys R Hell call it what you want.  All I know is that I barely escaped with my life.

2. Ziggy found his penis in the local super market.  And to think that I thought having kids was not going to be an enriching experience.

And my all time favorite entry for the year 2007 is...

1. My Big Girl Moment in the Gym. 

These are just a few of my favorites. 

I wish you all a very healthy, happy and joyous New Year.  May 2008 bring you all that you need.  Stay sane and most of all ENJOY!!!

See ya' Next Year!!!

until we meet again,

Holidays are always so exhausting...

Hey y'all,

The holidays have been exhausting.

My kids have had a wonderful time.  I have to admit that I have had a wonderful time with them.  We have been home for the past two weeks together and I have to tell you that being a SAHM is exhausting and exhilarating at the same time.

The kids made gingerbread men Christmas Eve.  I am so impressed with their abilities to make a beautiful masterpiece.  Then of course, I left them just a bit too long by themselves and they were able to turn it into a sugary mess. 

They did not even give me a chance to turn around before they had eaten off their legs and took big huge biting chunks out of the heads.  But they enjoyed it and all I could do was run for camera.

The kids had a blast on Christmas day.  The boys have this fascination with anything Spiderman.  So that was the theme.  I made sure to find anything and everything Spiderman.  They have a completely decked out Spiderman room.  My parents even found the boys some Spiderman suits that they wore all day long, went to sleep in and I just finally got those things in the wash this morning.

I did find a Spiderman Mr. Potato Head.  But I decided to keep it for myself.  It is my new official MOJO Fairy.  And to think that I was going to leave that in the store.  Thanks Cat, you are the bomb!!!

My daughter on the other hand is a PRINCESS.  There is nothing that you can say to her.  She is going to change her name to PRINCESS when she gets older.  In less than 24 hours, I have my girl hooked on the old movies, The Wizard of OZ, Mary Poppins, Sound of Music and Jungle Book.  Yep, that is my girl.  She made everyone watch OZ on Christmas at dinner.  It was good fun.

So when it is all said and done, I am so glad that the kids got to do all the things that I did when I was a kid and even better.  It was really not the gifts as much as it was watching their faces light up. 

Now, for the funny thing. 

Chi-Chi sits on my lap the next morning and says to me "Mama, can I write Santa another list?" 

So I say, "Chi-Chi, Santa was just here yesterday, why do you need to write him another list?  Did he forget something?"

"Oh No, Mama, Santa did not forget anything.  I did.  I forgot to tell him some things."

"Well, Chi-Chi, your birthday is coming why don't you tell me."

"Oh, Mama, Santa does not come on birthdays, so I just need to write my list."

Needless to say, she has started another list and I will be keeping it on the refrigerator for the rest of the year.  Just in case we need to add stuff to it as the year goes on.

until we meet again,

Hell R' Us

Yes, I need to tell y'all that up until yesterday, I had been able to escape this joint.

You ask me how was I able to do that with three kids.

All of the toys that the kids have, I was able to get out of other stores.  Plus, the boys are 3 and Chi-Chi is soon to be 5, so I have really had no reason to go there.

After making the decision that the kids were too young for a Wii and that they really want a lot of gifts so that they can rip paper, I did what I had to.

I got up at 6:30 am to screams of when is Santa coming.  Made breakfast, took a shower and hit the stores.  I went to the regulars -- Target, Marshall's, Ross and the Dollar Tree.

As I was leaving the Scrapbook Clearance store which just so happens to be in the same strip mall as Ross, I saw Toys R' Hell. 

I figured that all good parents went into this store.  I was on my new mission to be a good parent and I pulled into the parking lot.

The lot was jammed packed.  I finally found a spot.  I make a call to my friend Cat in Chicago and ask her for the tips and tricks to getting out of the place alive.

After my short pep talk, I get out of the car and make the trek across the lot.

I get in and OMG, the lights, the noise, the parents, the grandparents, the KIDS... Why were there kids in this store?  Why would you bring your children.  Even a Hell R' Us virgin like me knows to leave the kids at home.

I grab a cart and push on. 

As I get to the first aisle, I realize that I am breaking out into a cold clammy sweat.  I get back on the phone and call Cat.  I tell her that I don't think I can do it.  That I was in the middle of Christmas Hell and needed to leave.

She reminds me of why I am in the store, accomplish my mission. 

Where are the red shirts when you need one?  I am standing in the middle of the aisle just lost.  I have no idea where to go or what to do.  I have no navigation skills at all.

I finally find an employee who points me in the direction of anything High School Musical and the Little Pet Shop stuff.

OK, maybe I can do this.  I look and there is a woman who has resorted to taking what ever her 8 year old insists on putting in the buggy and tell him not to do it again, which is soon followed by the "Didn't I tell you not to do that?".

There is a father who has a newborn strapped to his chest, one in the cart, one holding onto the side and he keeps saying to his wife "How much does that cost?"

I looked over the HSM stuff and realized there was nothing that I did not already have or need.  So off I go to the Little Pet Shop.

As soon as I turn my buggy to go into the aisle, there are at least 9 women with their kids and buggies pulling everything into their carts and then running to hover in a corner to decide if they really are going to buy it.

I decide to hang back and wait for an opening.  As I am standing there in amazement, one mother says to another mother, "You have five of those, aren't you going to share so that we can all get one."  The other mother looks at her like she has lost her mind and says, "They will take my money like they will take yours.  No, I do not need to share."

Well, you guessed it the one mother reaches into the other mothers cart and just starts taking what she wants.  OH MY, why did she do that.  I just stood there and realized that it was probably best for me to leave the aisle because a fight was about to open.

I turn to run and there is that mom with the 8 year old who was putting all the stuff in the cart, she now has him by the neck and tells him in that low mama voice, "Don't you touch another fucking thing or Santa is not coming to the house."

I am now hyperventalating and my phone rings.  It is my Dad, he proceeds to ask me where I am at.  I told him that I was in Hell R' Us and his first response to me was "What the hell are you thinking?  Even if they only sell what you want in that store, I would not go." 

I told him that I was in the middle of a panic attack and that I could not move.  He told me to get out.  I actually had to hang up the phone in order to move. 

Now by this time, tears are rolling down my face and I am in a complete full blown PANIC ATTACK. 

I walked out of there as fast as I could, got in the car and called my friend Cat.  I told her that I could not do it.  I told her everything and she just laughed. 

Needless to say, I got in my car and drove to the other side of the county to get the rest of my gifts.

So, I am done Christmas shopping and I have decided that unless, they are giving it away for free, I will never grace the threshold of Toys R' Us again,

Lesson learned.

until we meet again,

Christmas... Is Tuesday!!!!

And I do not have single present for the kids.

Yikes!!!   OK, OK, I know that Jesus is the reason for the season.

I get it but I am feeling mighty stupid right now.  I finally decided that I was going to find the game of the season Wii from Nintendo.

Well of course, I made the decision to finally get it for the kids and I ran out today to try and find it at every store everywhere.

Now, yes, I know that all the places on the planet got their last shipment yesterday.  But I still had faith and so off I am facing the crowds with my 300.00 bucks ready to drop for my babies.

Now, do they know what a Wii is.  Of course not.  Did they ask for it...  Of course not.

What my boys want are Power Rangers and Superman and Spiderman stuff.

Chi chi just wants to have the High School Musical 2 DVD. 

Well, after feeling like I was not doing my job as a mama, I get a call from my friend Cat in Chicago.  Of course, she says to me with that are you a dumb ass? tone in her voice:

"And you thought that you would find it today because WHY? ... Did the kids ask for a Wii?  Why aren't you going to get them a bazillion little toys and let them play with paper?  They only want to open the gifts and rip off the paper, they could really care less what is inside them.  Lauren, apparently you have not seen that Arnold movie when he is out looking for the gift.  Move on and get those kids what they want."

Well, what can I say to that.  I proceeded to get back in my car and come home.

I am going to spend the day tomorrow gathering up the things that the kids really want and remembering to wrap everything so that they can play with the paper.

until we meet again,

I feel Good.....

Dannna NNNana nanna....  (That was my best James Brown)   Did you feel it???

It is official.  I am teaching on the circuit. 

I just got email confirmations for CKC St. Louis and CKC Mesa, AZ.  I also got confirmation for Scrapbook Expo in Pleasanton, CA.

I am so stoked.  I have been busting my crafting fingers to the bone.  I mean really.

I have been working through the day without a nap to get the samples done.  I have most of them done.  I just now need to upload them.

I am teaching 5 different classes on both Friday and Saturday.  I am so excited.  Now the teaching part is not a scare at all.  It is the rest of the mess.

It has been a real challenge to create for classes of 40 and 60 at a time.  But I have to admit that it is possible to do this and not give away my shirt or anyone else's for that matter.

But have no fear. 

I will not be having to put kits together.  Everyday Scraps has a booth.  They are sponsoring the classes that I will be teaching.

So here is the first of the five.

Now, I have not finished adding all the tags and stuff.  The shipment of all the new brads and ribbons and great other stuff that is coming in for this year as far as embellishments has not arrived yet.  So I can't put stuff on that I do not know will be available in the booth.

So here is the class description. 

Time for Fun! Hanging Calendar

Many of us will be making our new calendars, creating planners, updating our schedules, and trying to get re-organized for the coming year. Maybe you would like to make a calendar for yourself? Or would you like to get a jump start on a gift for next year's gift giving? In this fast paced class you’ll also learn timesaving tips and techniques. When this class is complete you’ll have a brand new memory calendar overflowing with the ribbons and tags and everything else that we can find.

until we meet again,

You get what you pay for...

You know sometimes you pay extra but what you are paying for is customer service. 

Y'all know that my basement is still not completely complete.  I still have a few things on a punch out list.

But in the mean time, I had my whole house carpeted.  I originally was thinking about using the local man store.  But after much discussion with the girls, they told me to use Empire Today.

So I called them up, got my carpet installed in the basement and then about 2 weeks later they installed the upstairs.

Well, let me just say this...

Because I got such a light color ... damn near white...  you could see all the seams.

Then to make it even worse, the first crew that came to do the installation did a really horrible job.  There were seams that were not closed completely.  There were puckers and wrinkles everywhere. 

Well of course, I said something when they were here.  But they told me that the wrinkles would go away as we walked on it and that this was normal.

Well, I walked on it and the seams got worse and the puckers and wrinkles never went away.

Now I understand what happened.  They had not stretched the carpet enough.

So as Thanksgiving is approaching and I am hating my new carpet more and more, it starts to unravel in my family room.  Now you have to understand that we no longer use the family room since we have had the basement done. 

So I get on the phone with Empire and tell them that besides all of this, the stairs are wearing too quickly considering I have not had the carpet for 90 days. 

After an independent inspection, and a few phone calls, they agree to replace all of my carpet. 

You heard me my whole house was redone.  Not only did they add the padding to the steps the way that I wanted it, but they let me pick a completely new carpet color.

Well of course, I went darker.  Thanks Amy for the advice.

And I have to admit.  I absolutely love the way that they did not.  Not a single seem to be found. 

Have a look...

And I have to be honest.  I did not pick the color my husband did.  He did a great job.

until we meet again,

I SCRAPBOOKED TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!

OK y'all, I have been crafting my butt off the past week.  The MOJO fairy has stuck it out with me.  She has really been trying to work my fingers to the bone.

Well anyway, I have to finish a few projects by Monday.  One of them is 2 12 by 12 page layouts.

Now, y'all know that I NEVER do layouts let alone 12 by 12.

Well, here it is! 

It nearly killed me. 

No metal, no ribbon, no extra junk (that's for you Cat).  I did have to use the acrylic scalloped frame and the acrylic flower in the middle of the frame for the picture. 

And yes ladies, that is my handwriting on the yellow strips. 

Can you believe it I journaled in my own handwriting.  Sandy would be so proud of me!!

until we meet again,

Can anyone tell me ...

Where is my Bed?  Have you seen it?  Has my husband been in it?  I surely have not seen it in the past few nights. 

He has actually been sleeping in the basement with me while the Mojo fairy and I hang out. 

Gotta love that man.

OK, so here are the things that I was working on for Altered Arts Magazine.

I was going to post them last night, but by the time I got everything ready for FedEx, I was beat.

 

Plus, the kids are coming down with a cold and I had to pick up one of them from school.  Gotta love Ziggy.  He looked at me and said "Mama, can I go to bed?"  Now you know that he is sick.  Just love that little man.

I have a few other things to get done tonight and it looks like it will be another late one.

So I am off to do what it is that I do. 

until we meet again,

Busy as a Bee

Well, I have been busting my butt to get caught up.

And to be honest, while I am a late bloomer, when I bloom, I blossom. 

So I have been working on a call for Altered Arts Magazine and it is only 4 days late.

I have gotten the directions almost all written.

I have finished 3 of 5 projects for 2008 to teach on the circuit.

Yikes, I am busy.  I will upload the galleries so you can see what is going on.

until we meet again,

It's my Birthday!!!

That's right, it is my birthday today!!!  Yes, I am a proud 42.  Gosh that seems so old considering that I can remember thinking that 25 was so old and that 30 was devastating.

So what are my plans for today...

Dont have any.  I am going to schedule myself for a message during the week and I need to get my projects done for the rest of the week. 

But otherwise, Nothing not a damn thing.

I am not even dropping the kids off or picking them up today....

Yep its my birthday.... 

Happy Birthday to me....  Happy Birthday to me!!!

until we meet again,